Raj Girn: This week’s leadership and advocacy-themed episode is entitled How Men Can Ignite the Power of Women to Optimize Their Life. To help us break this down, please welcome to the show Simon T. Bailey coming at this from a male perspective. So stick around because you know that we’re going to have a bit of fun with this one.

Before we say hello to Simon, here’s a little bit about him. Simon is a much sought-after leadership expert and author of multiple books that focus on the mindset and methodology behind tapping into your brilliance to create a life that’s well balanced and a life that’s intended for you. His framework is based on 30 years of experience in the hospitality industry, which includes being a sales director for Disney. He has also worked for Salesforce, T-Mobile, General Mills and the Hilton Hotels chain, just to name a few. Simon has three online courses featured on LinkedIn Learning that reach professionals in 100-plus countries. Most recently, Simon released a book entitled ‘Ignite the Power of Women in Your Life: A Guide for Men,” prompting me to dedicate this week’s episode to this very discussion.

Here is our conversation:

Raj Girn: Simon, welcome to the show and thank you so much for agreeing to be on.

Simon T. Bailey: Thank you for having me. So good to be with you.

We’re going to have so much fun here, but I want to start in a certain place. Simon. I want you to share with everyone who’s watching or listening or reading this a bit about your background that led you to becoming a leadership expert. Talk to me about that.

So when I was sales director at Disney, I got a call one day from a journalist. And whenever you work at Disney, you never talk to the media unless authorized. And this journalist said to me, “Where do you see yourself 10 to 15 years from now?” And I said, “I see myself as the president and CEO of the Walt Disney World Resort and eventually the chairman and CEO of the Walt Disney Company.” And he put it to print. So the article comes out and my boss is like, “What the heck were you thinking when you did this interview?”

And I said, “Larry, I work at this company whose motto is, ‘If your heart is in your dreams, no request is too extreme for when you wish upon a star, it makes no difference who you are.'” Funny today. Not funny then. So HR showed up and basically Disney invited me to find my happiness elsewhere. And what I discovered in being a leader, a leader is not just a title, but a leader invites individuals on a journey to discover the leader within themselves while they’re following you. So I could never take people to a place I hadn’t been myself. So that’s how I became a leader.

“A leader is not just a title, but a leader invites individuals on a journey to discover the leader within themselves while they’re following you. So I could never take people to a place I hadn’t been myself.” ~Simon T. Bailey

I love it. And the rest, as they say, is history. Let’s fast forward to this very interesting book. I want to ask you right out of the gate, why write this particular book?

First of all, it was therapeutic, just being quite frank with you. Secondly, it took me three years to write it, and it really was inspired by my divorce attorney who said, “You need to go and see a therapist as you get ready to go through this divorce.” I had been married for 25 years and the first thing Anita, the therapist, said is “No guy wants to go and sit on a sofa with a therapist named Anita, who’s been practicing for 40 years and has more degrees and a thermostat.”

And she said to me, “Whatever you don’t deal with will eventually deal with you.” And so I started writing. I went back to that moment and I said, “Wait a minute, I’ve got to help guide men to avoid the mistakes that I made. And oh, by the way, let me save you a $100,000.”

Yes, yes, yes, yes. I hear all the men saying “Yes, yes, yes, help me. Simon.”

So I wrote it from that place of failure, of not having the answers, of needing to take the mask off and really come clean with where I dropped the ball. And here’s the reality. Women don’t need their power ignited. They need for men to do their work. And when we do our work, it’s counter-intuitive. We ignite ourselves as a result of being in the right relationship with a great woman.

“Women don’t need their power ignited. They need for men to do their work. And when we do our work, it’s counter-intuitive. We ignite ourselves as a result of being in the right relationship with a great woman.” ~Simon T. Bailey

I love that. That’s a truth bomb right there. I’ve got to ask you this: What’s the key message of the book if it’s not already evident in the title? What is that crux? If there’s one thing that you need to understand about what you’re getting out of this book, what would that be?

The guide will work if you work it. If you do the work, and I realize I didn’t want to do the work initially. I had a ton of excuses why I couldn’t be emotionally available to my then wife, my daughter, all of the critical females in my life. And I had to do the work. So every single day, one foot in front of the other, it will work if you work it.

Yes, of course. So what is this journey that you take men on in the book? Explain it for us.

So I believe, first of all, every man is being invited to come to a place of emotional honesty. Here’s the reality. Women don’t want to be changed. They want to be understood. But it is difficult to understand a woman.

Can I stop you a second?

Yes.

Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. You may continue.

When you understand a woman, what a woman really wants is a man to come to a place of emotional honesty where he puts his truth on the table and he says, “I don’t know what I don’t know.” Now, she already knows that you don’t know. She’s just waiting for you to wake up and say that you don’t know so that she can help you.

Of course.

That’s the first thing is just emotional honesty. Here’s the other interesting thing is women want a conversation that goes three levels deep. And so when you are in a conversation with a woman and you’re tapping into what’s important to her, you recognize that the same letters that spell the word listen, spell the word silent.

And when you’re silent, you say, here’s what I heard you saying. Is this what you meant? Can we unpack that? Tell me more. And it’s in between the sentences in emotional honesty that literally you begin to open the vault of her soul because she knows that you’re not there for fun and games, but you’re really there to understand what makes her tick.

Yes. So tell me this: How have you structured the guide in the book so that it best suits a male audience psyche? Talk to me about that.

Such a great question. I’ll tell a quick story, but I give you a reflection where I ask you questions because the Socratic method of learning is to ask questions so you do the work. But a recommendation. Very quick, in bullet point format. So you move through it. Because I’m not here to predict preach at you that you need to do this. That’s the last thing guys want to hear because they shut down.

Right.

Come alongside as a guy to say, “Hey, here’s something to consider.” You decide if you’re going to opt in and actually do it.

I love that. So how do you feel that men will benefit from following your guide and methodology? What’s the input that you’ve gotten so far because this is based on experiential experience from your world. Talk to me a little bit about that.

A few weeks ago, a gentleman got on a plane, flew from North Carolina to Orlando, Florida, where I live, 35 years of age, very accomplished, very successful. He said, “I’ve been married for 10 years and it is as if you wrote this book specifically for me. My wife and I have hit a moment and I know I need to step up. You just saved our marriage.”

I heard from another gentleman who said, “You know what? You’ve given me the tools that I need. I just didn’t know that I was in my own way.” I’ve heard from women who have been reading the book to their husband and and elbowing him or their boyfriend to say, “Oh, my goodness, listen to this wisdom.” Because I share where I made the mistakes and give the invitation to say, here’s what you can consider doing.

So before we move on, I know that people are probably, like, chomping at the bit. Where can people get their hands on the book? Is it everywhere books are sold? Talk to me.

Everywhere books are sold. Obviously ignitethepowerofwomen.com. If they go to Amazon it’s on audible in my voice.

It’s going to be so much fun. Because I love your energy, Simon.

Thank you.

Why should men ignite the power of women in their lives considering they’ve been the dominant gender throughout recorded history? We know this and they have created the world’s social structure to benefit themselves. What do they need to empower women for? Like they have already attained . . . Like, what is that?

That is such a great question. First of all, there is a shift on the planet and the shift on the planet right now is we need the yin and yang energy. Number two, a man cannot know himself by himself. If a man ever wants to come into his full potential, it takes a strong woman beside him saying, “That joker wouldn’t be nothing if it wasn’t for me.” In other words, a woman puts a mirror in front of a man and helps release his potential by showing him his areas of opportunity. And then the third thing, obviously, I am a big proponent and advocate for equal pay, gender equality.

And for too long, men have operated with the fixed pie mindset. There’s only so much pie to go around. I’m going to take all the pie and throw the crumbs to the women. And the women are like, “I don’t need your pie because I will create my own pie and bring all my sisters with us.” So in other words, if we want to get into the future, I’m encouraging businesses to think about what are you doing right by women? How are women leading and co-leading the conversation? I said this to a room of 200 CEOs in San Diego. I said, “Any country, company or community that is going to be worth its salt must do right by women. Must do right by women.”

I love that. I really do. Because we have to create harmony in our universe, right? Which we don’t have right now because we’re not balanced. I love everything that you’re talking about. You know, honestly, guys, if you are just joining us, I’m speaking to Simon, who is a wonderful gentleman. He’s a leadership expert. He’s written a gazillion books. He’s been in the industry for over 30 years. And he speaks around the world.

And the crux of the book that he’s talking about right now is really about allowing men, allowing themselves to be able to step into the highest and best version of themselves by allowing support from women as well as supporting each other. I feel that this is the crux of what I’ve been hearing so far. And I want to ask you this, Simon: What have you learned that you feel is a game changer that you believe men need to know?

Number one, you don’t have to have all the answers. Number two, you don’t have to be right. When you release the need to be right, you become open to what wants to emerge. And number three, if a woman takes the lead, you don’t lose out. You become better together. So let me just drop a pen in that second idea. Here’s the thing.

For women, visibility creates credibility. But a man that needs to hold the spotlight and feel as if he needs to hold women back, he’s actually holding himself back because when you hold yourself back, you are not igniting the potential that is available to you. So the moment you begin to understand that the word love really comes from this understanding of giving instead of taking. And when I give away the thing that I want, I ultimately benefit because I’m not looking for anything in return.

“For women, visibility creates credibility. But a man that needs to hold the spotlight and feel as if he needs to hold women back, he’s actually holding himself back because when you hold yourself back, you are not igniting the potential that is available to you.” ~Simon T. Bailey

One of my greatest challenges that I had as a man and where I failed is my fixed pie mindset is I need to be in control. It’s my way or the highway. And you’re going to do what I say. Really? How’s that working for me? Well, it ended up in a divorce because she said to me, “You give everybody the best of you, but you give us the rest of you. And I don’t want the leftovers anymore.” And the reality is, I have built a house but lost the home. I was chasing money but had no meaning. I was pursuing status but had no satisfaction.

And what I recognized, when I got out of my way, I had to release the need to be the guy and recognize, wait a minute, it’s this woman who has come into our whole relationship and somehow I fell off the truck. Right? And so I’m inviting men to do the work to say, if I do right by this woman, we become better together.

I love that. And this book is a great starting point for wherever you’re at in your journey, guys. I mean, really and this is something that I’ve always believed in throughout my life. I don’t need to go through everything from an experience perspective to learn, right? Some things are meant for me and my destiny. Other things are meant for me to acquire through other people’s destinies. And I feel that this book is going to be the latter.

So I really do encourage you because I’m already so excited and intrigued to read this book. Simon I really, truly am. And I’ll tell you another thing that I found really interesting and why I’m intrigued is that you also quote women as the audience of this book as well. Can you share a little bit about that? You did allude to a little bit earlier. Let’s dive into that piece a little bit. What are you hearing specifically from women or perhaps from men who are quoting the women counterparts in their life?

So for 30 years, I have mentored women all over the world. And one of the things that’s a reoccurring thing that comes up with women. You have women nowadays who have their own money. They have their assets. They have their house. They don’t need a man, but they choose to be in a relationship with a man. And what they have said is, “Simon, I don’t need money. I’ve got my own money, but I need companionship without control.” So I’m hearing that men are coming into a relationship to control it instead of showing up to say, “How can I best serve you?”

The other thing is women have heard men say, “I love you.” They’re tired, they’re done. Anybody can say, “I love you.” They want somebody that says, “I cherish you. I see you. And when I cherish you, it’s not about what I can get from you. It’s about what I can give to you. That I will take a bullet. I will lay down my life. Because when I cherish you, it’s not about me. It’s about we.” And so what I’m hearing from men is, “Well, you have high powered women or women that are doing okay. They don’t need me for anything.” And what is happening is men are playing small because they will not step up. It’s not as if she doesn’t need you. She just needs to know if you’re going to be an asset instead of a liability.

And that’s the thing. Right Simon? This huge shift that you also talked about a little earlier on is a shift that I don’t feel, at least in recorded history we’ve ever experienced at this level before. So there’s no Bible out there that can help teach us how to go on this journey, which is why learning from each other’s experiences is really what we have at our disposal, right?

Yes. A part of the reason why I’m really doing this work. I was reading an article in ‘The New York Times’ about how the men in South Korea are absolutely upset with how women have been coddled and given all of the accouterments of success and the men have been left behind. And it talked about how men in South Korea are very discouraged, certainly here in the United States and all over the world.

Men have lost their way and they’re listening to men who are saying, “You’ve got to keep your thumb on women and you’ve got to go against the grain.” Are you kidding me? That is the exact thinking that has not worked. How do we now evolve and come alongside? The research says right now there are more women in college than men. So that means as women graduate from college, they will be elbowing men out of white collar jobs. So men are feeling left behind. And what I’m saying, you don’t have to be left behind. All a man needs is a really good woman who will have one conversation with him. And that might be all the therapy that he will ever need in his life.

“You don’t have to be left behind. All a man needs is a really good woman who will have one conversation with him. And that might be all the therapy that he will ever need in his life.” ~Simon T. Bailey

Wow. I love you. I mean, you just make me feel great as a woman, which I feel every day anyway. But you’re just amplifying that for me. Thank you so much.

All the women out there who are listening to this, you know, in your heart of hearts, even if you are not the woman that feels that you’ve ever been empowered, you’re empowered. I mean, there are men out there that are feeling that way about you.

So I want to ask you this: For those women who maybe, perhaps don’t feel empowered, how can this book help them?

So this book is going to give you the language to embrace and value and appreciate who you are. You don’t ever have to lower your standard for someone. You are worth everything. And so I showed you, here’s how you know your worth. In fact, I’ve encouraged several female friends before you get married, before you date, read this book because this is how a man should step up and step towards you. That’s number one.

The second thing, I think women will be empowered because I come alongside to confirm what they really believe about a man to say, “Whoa. Men do shut down. How do I respond to that? Oh, I am worthy of being wooed. Hello, world. I am worthy of romance. I am worthy of waiting until the right guy comes along. I am open to hearing where he is in his journey, and I’m not going to fix him.” So women are going to hear, you don’t have to fix a man. You don’t have to take on a project. You come as a 100 per cent whole woman into a whole relationship. He comes through door number one. You come through door number two. And together we’re going to go through door number three. How do we find a door together? So I really am inviting them to level up in their thinking and be empowered to never settle for the status quo.

Right. I want to play a little bit of devil’s advocate, the other side now as well. Simon, for women out there who feel that they just deserve to have everything because they are women. And give men a hard time and not allow them to step towards them. What would you say to those women?

Are you tired yet? Are you done working that? Can we let that go? You’re better than that. You were raised better than that. You have more values than that. Don’t be sucked in by popular opinion or what your girlfriends are saying. Do the right thing. We are human beings who want to connect with a human being.

And it’s as simple as that. You know, for men and women in personal environments, Simon, even intimate ones, how can the insights in this book be utilized? Give us something there.

One of the things that I teach in the book is that every woman has music. She has the music within her soul. And when a man understands that a woman wants to step to Beethoven instead of Tupac, then you begin to understand, how do I adjust to dance to the step that really speaks to her? That’s the first thing.

The second thing, as simple as, guess what? What would it be like to write a handwritten note to her? I know that’s old fashioned and old school. How do you begin to understand what makes her tick? How do you begin to give her access to your numbers? Say, “Here’s my cell phone, I trust you that much. You can scroll through it. Here’s my password and I’ll give you both phones. I have nothing to hide.”

When you come to that level of truth on the table, a woman will trust you. And she will become an advocate and a champion for you because she knows that you’re all in.

But for men out there who, let’s keep it real, have not been taught the nurturing side because rich cultures for generations put men in a certain bucket and women in a certain bucket. So as much as we talk about women stepping up and stepping into their power, there is a lot to be said about men also stepping up into their power in ways that they haven’t usually stepped into.

We talk about women stepping into her masculinity to equalize the femininity. We don’t so much talk about that with men. And I feel that you, through this book, are creating a conversation that needs to be had in that direction. Right?

So can we maybe touch base a little bit on that? Because I feel a part of this challenge is the fact that men don’t have the tools to meet the woman where she’s demanding to be met because of all of the upbringing. Talk to me about that.

What you just articulated is so spot on. What I recognized in a very masculine world and how I was raised. We shut down. We don’t talk. We don’t have that deeper conversation. And what therapy did for me was to, first of all, go back and look at the first woman that I ever learned to love. And that was my mother.

Yes.

Purpose identified is that I had some mama issues and she said, “You’re looking for love in all the wrong faces, in all the wrong places, because you’re looking to be mothered instead of loved.” And so what I recognized was like, okay, how do I show up healthy and whole to love a woman? What’s the steps? So I had to go back and get it right with my mom. That’s the first thing.

Wow.

And when I talked to her my mom said, “I have been waiting to have this conversation with you for 35 years.” And so I had to get whole with mom once I got home with mom. Then I could show up in my masculinity, but I would be okay sharing my feelings because I was no longer hiding or keeping the mask on so I could have a real conversation and say, “Guess what? I’m still paying alimony. It’s pretty significant. I’m paying for college. And oh, by the way, I’m bringing this into the relationship. I don’t want to hide from you. I want to be truthful with you because I’m still trying to figure it out. How do you feel about this level of transparency?”

And so I introduce a term in the book called MVP, Most Vulnerable Person. When a man shows up most vulnerable. Now, let’s add a little disclaimer. I’m not talking your spam her and you spit up on her. “Oh, my goodness. The sky is falling. Woe is me. I’m a victim.” Okay. Time out. I’m saying. “Guess what? I am perfectly imperfect. I am flawed. But I am open to discovering how to become better with you. That’s all a woman wants. That level of honesty and clarity.”

How do you feel a woman can help that journey for the man?

Yeah. So first of all, listening to him and releasing the need to fix him.

Yes.

You don’t need another project. I think the second thing is, men, we want to be respected and honored, celebrated rather than tolerated. So to have a woman say, “Guess what I appreciate about you 1, 2, 3” and list it out. What that does for a man, because we probably have not received proper validation and affirmation. You know, we get it from our guy friends, but when it comes from a woman, it’s heard differently. It’s received differently. Begin to tell us what’s right about us instead of what’s wrong with us.

But then here’s the other thing. If we notice something that I am not doing, I’ve dropped the ball or I have a repeated behavior or pattern. Say, “I’ve noticed whenever you do this, whenever you say this, here’s how it makes me feel. What do you think about that?” And when we hear that the way it’s been positioned, the tone, the phraseology, it’s inviting us in instead of shutting us out. So I think being very mindful of what’s the feedback that I’m giving him that invites him to grow.

Absolutely. And how is that similar or dissimilar? When we’re in professional environments, we put men and women in those spaces. How can this book help them there?

Yeah. So we’ve got an entire chapter dedicated to igniting the power of women in business.

Thank God.

Here’s the first thing to think about in business. Number one for the men who are listening, how do you become an advocate and an ally for women? Here’s the example. I was talking with a colleague and she said she was sitting in a meeting. She teed up an idea and it was like crickets. Nobody said anything. A few moments later, the guy that was in the meeting said the same thing in a different way. And all of the males around the table were like, “Oh, my goodness, that’s a great idea.” What she really needed was an ally to step forward and say, “Wait a minute. Karen, Sharon, Cheri just said that. Let’s get behind her idea and support it.”

So guiding the power of women in business is understanding how do I be the advocate and ally. Number two, how do I approach a professional female colleague and say, “You know what? I’m probably going to say something where it’s going to be open mouth, insert foot. Would you hold me accountable and tell me why I what I just said was inappropriate or it made you feel uncomfortable? Because guess what? I want to be better. I want to do better.”

And I think the third thing is women in business, they problem solve differently. Men, we’re very linear. Women take a 360 degree view of a problem. So in business, we must say we are the women. We’ve got to have women weighing in on this problem that we’re trying to solve. We cannot solve it by ourselves just with the male ego.

Absolutely. Let’s throw another spanner into the mix here. As you were talking, there’s a lot of thoughts going on in my head and I want to share a few of them with you. We live in a world today where identity is extremely important.

And your book talks about men and women, which I see as you talking about masculine and feminine. A lot of people identify as men, as women, and then as many other identities. Can you speak to how they could look at helping them with this book? I feel like I know the answer, but I want to hear what you have to say.

So, first of all, wherever you are on the planet, however you self-identify, you deserve to be respected and honored for being a human being. So what this book does is gives you the permission to understand how wherever you self-identify that you are more than enough and you are worthy for love in whatever that looks like for you. But the main thing is you are to be respected for who you are. And when people honor you and meet you there, then everything else takes care of itself.

“Wherever you are on the planet, however you self-identify, you deserve to be respected and honored for being a human being. So what this book does is gives you the permission to understand how wherever you self-identify that you are more than enough and you are worthy for love in whatever that looks like for you.” ~Simon T. Bailey

And this book is also a guide that meets that as well, because we’re talking here about not identity, not creating identity around physicality as much as what’s going on inside of ourselves that feel that there’s a deeper element here that you’re touching upon in this book that people need to really get to the crux of what that means and what shows up for them in that regard, based on their historical experiences, how their view of life and the experiences that they have gone through or are going through. Well, do you have any comments on that?

I would say the book is not about me trying to change your world view. The book isn’t to invite you into a conversation to consider another perspective, and then you decide if you want to opt in and adapt some of the key takeaways.

Absolutely. And I love that. And and that’s a mark of a really good book, a really good guidebook, a really good book that is work booking you through a specific journey because we all identify and come to a specific piece of knowledge from our own individual space, whatever that may be.

So the big thing from my perspective of what I’m hearing you say, Simon, I feel that it really is something that you need to adapt to who you are and where you’re at and who you want to be and where you want to be.

Perfect. I couldn’t have said it better myself that spot on.

There is one other spanner, I feel, that needs to be thrown in the mix there as well. And that is the obvious ethnicity. Ethnicity also has this very staunch idea of masculine and feminine. We’ve all been taught it. You and your culture, me and mine.

How can this book help people move that out of the way so that they can actually get to the crux of the traits of theirs that are identifiable traditionally as male and traditionally as female, and understand what cocktail or combination of that is going to be the version that they need to step into to get them to where they’re trying to get to? Because that ethnicity piece that piece is also ugh, you know.

Thank you for this question. I love this question. I didn’t see this question coming.

Good, I’m glad.

One of the things I realize is when you practice self-love for yourself, when you love the skin that you’re in and you recognize that at the end of the day, everything comes down to love. So then what I do in the book, I make the statement and I say, love isn’t love until you’ve given it away. But you cannot give what you don’t have. You cannot be who you’ve not become. And it’s difficult to do what hasn’t been done to you, especially if a person is from an opposite race and that race has oppressed your ethnicity.

Right.

So when I say love isn’t love until you’ve given it away, a little piece of research for you. Well, Emory University says when you help someone else, love someone else, the reward centers in our brain begin to light up almost as if we are on the receiving end of this act of kindness, this love that we have extended to someone else with no strings attached.

Emory University says when you do that, it’s called the helper’s high because there is something that washes over you and you begin to understand that love and respect have no color because I love myself enough to show up for you wherever you are.

And I’m not here to fix you or to make you disavow hatred. I’m just here to love you where you are. And when I love you for where you are, I see you, I value you. I appreciate you and I communicate that to you. And the vibration of love allows us to move to a frequency of dialogue and conversation. And in that frequency we discover that I need you and you need me.

“And I’m not here to fix you or to make you disavow hatred. I’m just here to love you where you are. And when I love you for where you are, I see you, I value you. I appreciate you and I communicate that to you. And the vibration of love allows us to move to a frequency of dialogue and conversation. And in that frequency we discover that I need you and you need me.” ~Simon T. Bailey

Amen to that. So as we get ready to close up for anyone not quite bought into the ideology and belief system that we’ve been talking about, which is just the foundational elements of this book, what would you say to them?

I would invite you to think about your thoughts. There are 60,000 thoughts that pass through our mind every single day. But thoughts create a belief system. A belief system creates a feeling. A feeling creates action, and action creates a habit. So I would invite you to consider your interests, evaluate what are my thoughts? What do I feel? Am I open to perhaps identifying a new habit of igniting the power within myself and the opposite sex?

I love that. Is there anything that we haven’t touched upon today that you feel people need to know regarding today’s topic? Which I’ll say it again, is how men can ignite the power of women to optimize their lives.

So one of the things that we’ve done in supporting this work is when you go to ignitethepowerofwomen.com, we have a free one year success plan where we’ve given you a specific plan that you can operationalize into your life. And then we’ve taken it a step further.

We also have created a six week course that hold you accountable to some specific things that you can do beyond the book. So this is not just a book. It’s a way of life. It’s a way of being. Because right now I’m telling you, we need women now more than ever before to lead and co-lead us into the future. And men, I’m just simply helping you get there.

I love that. Any final words that you want to leave people with, Simon? Maybe an experience or a light bulb moment from your life that you feel has shown up with a lot of feedback that you’ve gotten from people that have read the book so far.

My daughter Madison, who’s now 20, came into my home office two years ago and I was just emotionally unavailable and she said, “Hey, Daddy.” I said, “Hey, baby girl.” And I sense she wanted to talk, but I was just not there. And she left the office, and it hit me on the plane. I missed the moment to connect with my daughter. And I came back home and I said, “Madison, you wanted to talk to me.” And she said, “Daddy, it’s okay. You’re busy.” I said, “No, if I don’t change my behavior, you’re going to marry a joker just like me.” And what I recognize is it was that moment where I was modeling something for her of a man who was emotionally disconnected.

And I didn’t want her brother, my son, to see this behavior. And that was the real impetus behind this work. I have heard from males and females all over the world that when they saw and read that story, it totally gripped them because they said, that’s it. Family is everything you do. You can chase money, but what’s money? Build your life around who will be crying at your funeral. Because if you kick the bucket expire or check out tomorrow, your job is going to be posted on the internal Internet. Your business will be sold and life will go on.

Yeah.

How do you keep the main thing, the main people where they are? And here’s the last thing I’ll say. Find a way to hug people with your words. Hold people with your words. Say something that’s encouragement, is oxygen for the soul. That might be the very thing that ignites them.

And encourages them and motivates them and inspires them to do the work.

Yes.

How can people stay in touch with you, hang out with you, maybe work with you, go check out your courses? Give us all that information.

So, simontbailey.com, the T is for terrific. Just kidding. It was right there. It was right there.

Dont kid. I mean, like this hour we spent together. You are terrific, darling.

Simontbailey.com and then on social media SimonTBailey.

Brilliant as simple as that. And if people want to go access these courses of yours, where are we sending them?

ignitethepowerofwomen.com

Simple as that. That’s brilliant. This has been tremendous. I really appreciate you coming on and sharing your perspective and being honest, as a man and allowing for the men that are watching, listening, reading this, as well as the women, as well as however people identify, the opportunity to know that it’s the work that is going to take them to the promised land. And your book is a guide that is going to help them accomplish the balance between the masculine and feminine, because without that, our world is not going to have harmony. And that’s where we need to be, because we deserve it, right, Simon?

Yes, we do.

Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you, guys. I really hope that you got some real value from today’s show and we’ll share it with everyone you know who you feel needs to get today’s learnings.

I also hope that you will subscribe to my YouTube channel at The Open Chest Confidence Academy so that you never miss an episode and you know that we drop them every Wednesday. You can also download the audio versions if you search on any podcast platform ‘The Transform Your Confidence Show’ and if you’d like to read and bookmark and all that fun stuff that is old school, which is what I’m all about, go to theopenchestconfidenceacademy.com/media/podcast. I’ll see you next week for another invaluable episode packed with insights and learnings just like this one with Simon to help empower your world, your life and your spirit.

Take care of yourself, guys. I’ll see you next week.

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